dear theo,
my sweet boy, you are asleep in my arms as i type this one handed on a blustery and rather uneventful february afternoon. you all snuggled up and cozy my arms is your happy place. it's mine, too. i cherish it and am so blessed to be able to do it every afternoon...even all afternoon if we both desire.
the chilly winter wind is blowing the curtains on our porch right now and all i can hear is you sucking rather vigorously on your paci. your eyelashes are fluttering and you are sinking into the dark crevasse under my arm where it's warm and safe, all ready to take your afternoon nap. you are starting to teeth right now and your paci, along with your long fingers and wooden key teether, are always in your gummy mouth. you can thank nana and papa herder for your first set of keys, little one. you enjoy sucking and drooling on it while watching me make dinner.
at four darling months, you are filling out and are in your three to six month clothes. i cannot help but squeeze your middle and hold you tight at this chubby stage. the closer i hug you the wider you smile. you prefer to be held all day long and it radiates like sunbeams when you are in my arms.
this stage of your sweet life has brought me so much happiness. you must know, i love kissing the spot where your chin meets your chest to hear your deep giggle. i do it about twenty times a day. sometimes more if you are particularly clingy that day. and oh, how i am smitten with the smell of milk that covers your soft skin and thick handsome hair. it smells like you and makes me feel like home.
every evening before getting you in your jammies i inch my fingers up your tiny rib cage to see your face light up in delight. your eyes smile and you curl up into a little ball, your toes nearing your mouth. this is one of your favorite times of the day. such a ticklish little fellow you are! when in the bath tub after supper you wiggle and stretch and slash all around, never making a fuss. i think you are going to be a little fishy like your sister when you get older.
one of my very favorite things that you do right now happens every time that you nurse. your little hand rests on my chest right above my heart. you hold it there and press down, calming me. soothing me. showing me you love me. it makes me feel complete. it is so beautiful.
on the eve of your fourth month you rolled over, theodore! we were all in the living room that evening oooing and ahhing over you, as usual. the three of us were watching your eyes follow us as we rolled around wrestling on the rug, and what do you know, you rolled over to your back for the first time ever. we all squealed and put you back on your tummy to watch you do it again. and again. and again for good measure.
just last night, we started putting you in your nursery to sleep. yes, that's right, in your big boy bed. not having you in your bassinet at an arm's reach away was more difficult for me than you. we sense you really like your big crib though, for you slept well last night. i did miss hearing you snore and stretch throughout the night. it is a real comfort to me knowing you are in the same room as i. around one in the morning i heard little grunts and a faint cry telling me it was time for your middle of the night feeding. i am sure if we had let you cry it out you would have fallen back to sleep, but i cherish our late night cuddles, so i went in and scooped you up. we went out into the living room and sat there together in silence. you ate and grinned and ate some more. i couldn't see you smiling as we cozied in the corner of our couch in the dark, but i felt it, and therefore, it made me smile too.
theo, you are pure joy. pure sweetness. you are a mama's boy and a charmer. you have enriched our lives in ways we could have never dreamed possible and we adore you to bits.
love, your mama
