homestead // storing & managing toys

toys! kids! utter chaos, amiright?!  those without kids give the old eye roll and tend to snicker when it comes to this topic, but reality with small children is as such.  it's pretty nuts, the toy situation, and it can get out of control fast if you let it.  with the arrival of little ones comes the constant trickling in of all their little things, and then a whole bunch of stuff on top that.  oy.  i just cleaned the couch out and found an entire outfit to dress a barbie and enough legos to build a rocket ship.  you see, i know a thing or two about all of this, and if you have a kid or two or five i am betting you do too.

i have found that it takes all of about a few hours for one's home to become a giant storage container for toys and games and all things kiddo.  if you're anything like us, your baby had more stuff than you before they were even born.  probably because a list said you needed it.  and you obliged.  i've been there.  thanks, target.  but now you've realized you really don't need a bottle warmer or five plastic music makers and forty stuffed animals just isn't really necessary.  just a few nice things will do and perhaps, just a few quality toys will even make playtime better.

and because christmas is coming up, let's talk about this.  so how does one maintain a simple, joyful, decluttered home and not have toys scattered in a mess everywhere, yet keep one's home a place that invites creativity and imagination and playtime?  this is a question i get a lot as it's something we take the time and work to tend to on a regular basis doing our best to prevent our home from becoming cluttered and thoroughly disorganized.  andrew and i have learned it takes a bit of strategy and discipline to manage this as to not become so overwhelmed with all the stuff.  hopefully this post will help break down how we do what we do when it comes to storing toys (and their other tiny things) in our home for our three children.  simple is calming and we like it that way.

to start, it's worth mentioning that we moved to our current home from a less than eight hundred square foot condo where storage was majorly lacking.  tiny closets and close to no built-ins resulted in us getting very creative with how we stored everything, toys included.  in addition to storing creativly, we also grew to be fairly ruthless when it came to what we even allowed up those steep three flights of stairs.  if we loved it, if it brought us joy (or sparked joy if you follow marie kondo), if we need to use it, up it came.  everything else got the boot, more or less.  this mindset helped us pair down to the essentials, and then some, when nesting and in keeping of our small tree house home.

we've used the same intentional approaches here in this home, despite it being much larger and more accommodating to a family of five.  in addition to this essentialist discipline, we approach gifting a bit differently than most as well.  instead of getting the kids dozens of toys for birthdays and holidays etc., we get them just a few thoughtful gifts along with some practical items, with a much larger emphasis on experiences and fun things to do out and about in this city, like ballet lessons or an art class or tickets to a play.  this makes for less stuff on those all to familiar toy-crazed occasions.  i am working on a post about gifting where i will address more of the specific on this, so stay tuned for that.

now let's chat about what to do after your kids have received their toys.  where do they go?  how does one thoughtfully store them?  and it is worth keeping organized?  i'll answer that one right off the bat for ya, YES.  it will make your home so much more calming and peaceful.  to address the other questions, i have one beautiful word for you: baskets.  i feel if you're going to be am item and will be looking at it everyday, why not make it pretty, right?  over the years i have accumulated quite the basket collection, each of them a bit different but all made from lovely natural fibers.  some are tightly woven, others a folding over of gorgeous textures.  we have them all over our home and in just about every room, each basket home to something most always kid related.  you see that basket on top of our hutch?  bet you wouldn't guess there are legos in there, but there are.  by using natural fibers, you are bringing something beautiful into your home, giving it warmth and charm, while also creating a pretty and practical storage solution.  i love baskets with handles for things such like wooden blocks so the kids can pull it to where they want to build.  we use smaller baskets for small toys and keep those up on a shelf, easy to reach when wanting to play but tucked away and off the floor.  for large toys, we like woven toy bins because of the magical fact it can be closed, giving the look of a polished room when the kids are not playing.

also important to note, we are careful not to keep too many baskets in one room, for this seems to present the issue of too many toys in one space, ultimately overwhelming the kids with what they can play with.  if you keep to just one or two baskets per room, it makes both playtime and clean up go much more smoothly.  so keeping all the toys in one space is not something that has worked for us.  ultimately, they all get dumped out on the floor and one gigantic mess results with little to no playing.  perhaps you've experienced differently, and hopefully so, but this is why we choose to spread them about our home instead.

what do we do for art/crafting supplies?  yes you guessed it, more baskets, but also clear mason jars too, for practicality's sake.  we store things to draw with in one place, construction paper in a big bin, and then random bits like pastels and paints and brushes in jars with lids.  we keep these things well hidden in our dining room storage so it's easily accessible since we do crafts just about everyday, but also out of sight because there's nothing like a disarray of art supplies to make a room look cluttered.  i like to keep these supplies within reach for stella so she can use them whenever she wants, but our of sight to keep with our simple aesthetic.  it works for us.  those doors at the bottom of our hutch is where we keep all of these things.

and then there's the old recycling toys trick, and boy this is a good one.  here's my proposal to you, take all of your kids toys and bring them into one room, say a large space like your living room.  dump all of them out onto the floor, taking half of that large pile and donating them to a good home.  you heard me correctly, get rid of half.  just be ruthless and edit that pile.  you can do it, i believe in you.  i recommend not doing this when your kids are around or they will freak out when they see you getting rid of their things, even if they have not paid attention to those specific toys in years.  i speak from experience, stella was not a happy camper when she saw me doing this as she said, "stop mom, i am freaking out." so i just waited until she was asleep, and you know what?  she did not even bat an eye at all the toys that were missing.  you should know just by being around your babes what they love and play with, so the sorting should go fairly fast.

after getting rid of half of your preexisting toy pile, cut that smaller pile you have labeled as "the keepers" in half as well.  put those carefully selected items in a storage bin down in the basement or somewhere where your little ones will not find it.  a few times a year you can do a swap and recycle the toys from the storage bin with those upstairs.  it's like christmas in july!  or whenever you decide to do it.  the kids love this and are so much more engaged with their toys as opposed to having a hundred choices surrounding them, ultimately leaving them dissatisfied and "bored".  if you follow this trick, you'll end up having one fourth of your existing child's toys on display around your home, helping tremendously in terms of living more simply and mindfully with regard to your child's toys.

where do i find my baskets and storage bins?

thrift stores
loom goods
the container store 
home goods
brookfarm general store (all their storage is dreamy!)

okay, that was a lot about toys and organizing.  what other questions do you have?  happy organizing!

motherhood // we sat on a hill

my boys and i, we sat on a hill the other day, our favorite hill in the city.  it is one we've came to and played on and picnicked at more times than i can count as a little family.  it's a pleasant place for us, almost always painting our canvas calm and happy and bright.  this hill and this park, it echos serenity and reminds us to be still.  it's a harbor for us in the middle of a life's sometimes turbulent sea, for it's here in the open space that we take refuge when needing a fresh perspective or just a place to let out a bellowing "ahhhh."

i've needed quite a bit of these moment lately.  to bellow and so forth.  because motherhood, despite all of it's beauty and wonder is very, very hard.  i've been dealing a bit with separation anxiety from certain people along with some yucky postpartum stuff, so being deliberate with my time and reflecting on the little things that spark joy in my life have become absolutely essential.  a mindset worth cultivating and nurturing.

and because my heart was calling out for it, we came the hill while stella was in preschool, while she played with her new friends and learned about the five senses.  we came as the three of us, so i, their mama bear, could seek solitude and a chance amid the changing trees to just sit in stillness.  so i could spread out our blanket overlooking the green so i might breathe deeper.  to breathe in longer and more fully, ballooning my lungs as big as i dare, inviting my soul the chance to dance away from some of life's more hectic and lonely dips, to feel lighter and freer.  because some days are just hard.  some weeks a struggle.  some take a lot more courage to get back up after having fallen or simply after having just taken a short dive into the clouds.  and that's okay.  it's those hard days and or weeks that teach us so much, that help us grow, giving us the tools to hopefully do better.  

to the hill we came, to take in the rich connection of myself and nature, whereupon i did, as i always do, find purpose and peace and magic in the seemingly mundane.  to feel the grass on my toes, speckled with leaves and twigs, telling me autumn is coming.  tenderly enfold my arms around my baby and nurse him, his suckling sounds filling me up.  to watch my wild theodore run around barefoot with his toy truck, smiling smiling smiling.  to crack open and be encouraged by a new book, rising strong by brine brown.  she's amazing, isn't she?  to hear the singing birds overhead, preparing for their journey south.  to sit in stillness and quiet my mind, and give gratitude for gift that it is to live another day as a wife, a mom, a daughter, a friend.  all of this, on a hill, as i sat with my boys.  to any mamas going through a rough patch, i wish i could give you a big hug.  you'll get through it.  you're not alone.

*i want to thank all of you who have left kind comments below, i have read each one several times and i am so grateful for your support and tender hearts. xx

motherhood // meal planning in my favorite corner

i've mentioned it a small handful of times on instagram, but i haven't really talked about the ins and outs of one of my favorite sunday pastimes: meal planning.  the former teacher in me loves a sturdy plan to help set the tone for our week.  taking a little chunk out of the day to pour over recipes and inspiring words about food helps me in more ways than one to keep things organized around here.  given that structure, rhythm, and eating are all dear to my heart, meal planning for the week comes second nature to me.  it is something i thoroughly enjoy doing, as i find to it be very soothing in addition to good prep for the week ahead as a stay at home mom.  it gives me a proper chance to look at our days and sort them, figuring out what our week is going to look like before it starts.  and when my brain is in mom fog and in need of ideas, there's my plan already mapped out on paper, making the process of cooking supper that much easier when looking after little ones.  i quite like that.

my process for meal planning is roughly the same each week.  i'll grab three or four cookbooks off the shelves, each week changing things up, and lay them out on the table in our kitchen.  i always gravitate towards our eat in nook because i love sitting near the big window that overlooks our backyard.  it's such a cozy corner and i think my favorite in our home.  there, usually with a second cup of coffee in hand, i'll open up my cookbooks, look at the pictures, thumb through for inspiration, scribble notes on my notepad, and the like.  sometimes, i'll bring over my computer and browse pinterest for some ideas.  but almost always before starting, i'll do an inventory of what needs to be used up that is already in our fridge or freezer.  i'll write that down and try to find recipes that accommodate.  not only does this helps us not waste food, but also gives me a starting place with an ingredient.  oh, there's frozen pork shoulder in the freezer?  how about crock pot verde tacos?  bacon that needs using this week?  let's make carbonara.  something like that.

carving out time to plan our meals not only helps me organize my week, it also makes things much easier when at the grocery store.  in accordance with my meal plan, i'll write out the week's worth of groceries i need, making it easier to budget and not overspend at the store.  i feel like every time i go to the store without my list i end up getting frivolous items like gooey cheese or random sweets.  i am one of those people that benefit from writing things down.

here is the typical layout i stick to when meal planning.   in a seven day week, i'll plan to cook three to four wholesome suppers.  i will usually do this every other day but not always, by choose the days in our calendar that work best for slow meals.  usually those are evenings andrew will be home early and in time to enjoy them with us before we start bedtime routines with the kids.  aside from the three to four meals i'll be preparing, i'll add one crock pot meal and cook it on a day when we are most busy.  this usually falls on days i clean or have errands to run.  that makes four to five meals for a seven day week.  the other days i am not cooking are open for leftovers or for going out.  we typically do not eat out during the week and prefer to save that as our weekend treat.  here's an example of what a typical meal plan for one week might look like:

monday:
- grilled chicken and asparagus with miso soy glaze (it's all good cookbook pg. ---)
- arugula salad on the side with strawberry dressing (use up those berries tonight)

tuesday:
- crock pot pulled bbq pork shoulder with pineapple bbq sauce (pinterest recipe, use frozen pineapple)
- sweet potato fries seasoned with old bay
- garden salad on the side with oil and vinegar (use up garden tomatoes today)

wednesday:
- mini chicken pot pies with sourdough crumb topping (my recipe, use frozen stock and rest of carrots)

thursday:
- left over night

friday:
- eat out for supper
- ice cream sundaes for dessert (use bananas)

saturday:
- mild ancho beef chili with essential oil rosemary cornbread (yellow farmhouse recipe pg. ---)
- trader joe's artichoke ravioli with brown butter

sunday:
- brunch
- frozen pizzas

when it comes to meal planning i am not rigid nor do i make things hard on myself.  the whole point of the plan is to make things less stressful, so getting super detailed is only a means of helping me out when i need it, not to impress or make things fancy.  when preparing our meal, i'll usually enlist the help of stella who is now at the age where she can peel and stir and sometimes chop (with my observation).  it's fun to spend this time together and i know it makes her feel special. sometimes in the planing stages i'll ask her to choose between two or there recipes to add on our weekly menu.  she loves helping in this way and i feel it also helps her eat better come suppertime since she had a hand in the prep.  i am putting together my favorite crockpot recipes for a future autumn post, so stay tuned!

motherhood // a little essay on life with three and a celebration of myself

we've just returned from a trip to the oregon coast for a bit of summer fun and to iowa where we got to spend time with family.  as far as vacations with little ones go, it was everything we'd hoped for and more.  our days were long and beautiful and adventurous there was lots of messes made.  like that time theodore found my lip stain before the sun came up and colored his little heart out all over his face and our room and my things.  that was fun.  but seriously.  on top of all the craziness and nights spent awake nursing or keeping toddlers from falling off beds, topping it all by miles and miles, were our very full hearts as parents.  hearts bursting with happiness from all we got to see and do together as a family, and that's the darn truth.  we are back home in kansas city with september here and preschool having just started.  the five of us are finally settling into a routine of sorts and it feels really good to have our days strung together with simple joys and comforting routines.

it's morning time and i've got my favorite yellow legal pad full of little square boxes to my left sitting atop our white tablecloth, a real to-do list maker this former teacher is.  there's a sleepy baby with warm milk still wet on his upper lip to my right, having just spent the last hour or so on my breast, half eating, half sleeping and relishing the warmth of my body.  stella is running around the soggy yard in her elsa halloween costume singing an ear-piercing rendition of "let it go" and theodore quietly taking his favorite little toy car over and under and around everything in his path, ever so gently.  strong chicory coffee with heavy coffee cream and bright green juice have both been drank quickly and i am contemplating another cup of each to get me through the afternoon.  it's friday.  i am tired, very tired.  but this no surprise from you i am sure, as it is to be expected of a mama who wakes every three hours or so to feed her hungry bub throughout the darkness of the night.  i could use a long shower to shave my legs and keep thinking about my yellow yoga mat to stretch out on, but that will come after lunch.  the house is pretty tidy and ready for the weekend which feels nice since my parents are visiting while andrew is away, and like every morning, our daily load of laundry is downstairs spinning.  tonight's supper is simmering away on the back burner, and the house smells like a yummy roast.  sometimes i'll just throw things found in the fridge with a big hunk of meat into my big cast iron pot and let them simmer away for hours.  more often than not what turns out is really quite tasty.  i've found you can't quite mess up a roast, unless of course you roast the heck out of it.  and if you happen to do so, there's  always ketchup.  it's really starting to feel like fall here in the midwest and in fact leaves have already turned on our walnut tree out front.  we've got the windows thrown open and the porch doors swung back, letting a gentle breeze make its way from one end of our home to the other.  such is our day thus far.  it has been good to us.

i've been meaning to write about how motherhood has been with three little ones, but each time i get settled into a comfy writing position, it's time to nurse or change a diaper or make a meal.  at such times, the computer gets closed and pushed under the covers so i can do what i do best and love on and take care of my babies.  it has taken me two whole months to get my thoughts out but here you have it.  life with three.  so how is you ask?  are we surviving?  how's the chaos?  what's it like in our home nowadays? is it just crazy loud?  to those who ask my reply is always the same.

it's just so good. and also, so very hard.

can it be both?  is it okay to say that it is both to those who are probably just asking to be polite?  can a mother or father simultaneously be swallowed up with pure joy and be still be struggling, and i mean really struggling to find their way?  oh, absolutely.  a rehearsed and flaccid, "it's great," just doesn't cut it.

i have found, especially true this time around with three little ones under four, that riding those parallel train tracks IS parenthood.  it is a steady, rhythmic beat that sways and rocks to the tune of not one, but two competing melodies, one sweet and lovely and bright, the other chaotic and loud and sometimes full of dark doubting shadows.  it is both for me.  and so i have found that rather than describe this journey as a serious of ups and downs, a flow of valleys and mountains rising and falling and soaring and crashing, to unfold the truth of its two extremes and how they more accurately (in my own experiences) overlap and intersect like growing vines, thus making this calling a beautiful one that is also the hardest thing i have ever done and presume will ever do in this life of mine.  i love it.  and it's hard. and that's where where i am at these days.

when alfie was about a month and a half old andrew and i decided to have someone come by the house a few hours a week to help give me some mama time.  the constant giving and giving as a mother to three small children at home was really catching up with me and as a result, i was starting to neglect myself.  everything was in order, put in its place, all the bubs bathed and fed and swaddled and more. all except for me, i just didn't seem to make it that far in the day.  sure a long uninterrupted shower would have been nice, and i did take those when given the chance, but this was more than just me needing to get a good lather in whist in solitude.  i started to feel that what was most in need of nourishment was my inner self, my soul and who i was as a woman detached from my role as a mother, so i could be a better mother. because one has to come before the other.  it just so happens that when i took a good hard look in the mirror i saw a mom who looked like she could use a real break.

after sharing this with andrew, we both decided i was in need of a little reprieve every now and again to really start to find myself and connect to my emotions and with my body in a healthy way.  after all, my pregnancy had been pretty rough on me and now my body was still healing from delivery.  the selflessness in creating and caring for anther human so intimately requires an enormous amount of energy, on mental and physical and emotional levels.  it was time i make time to fit in things just for me.  yoga a few times a week, some time to rest without a baby within arms reach, to read, to take a walk by myself.  things that nurture and heal.  and so with our plan, we had the most wonderful helper come and i was jolted at how hard it was to let go of control and give up my domain as mother hen in our home.  surprisingly, i was flooded with a whole new set of emotions, ones dealing in shame and felt like defeat, on top of already feeling overwhelmed and a little lost.  the perfect self i was striving to be was unable to accept that i was hardwired for failure, just like everyone else that is and ever was.  us flawed, broken humans, we make things so complicated don't we?  i know i do.  i tend to get so caught up in my own head that i miss the target altogether and create a world that is impossible to live in.  i needed a hefty dose of reality and i needed to get grounded, and fast, so i talked with family and friends and watch probably too many brene brown videos and relentless ted talks and read story after story of mamas just like me, who were feeling similarly in needed help to get out of their rut, but felt shame in doing so.

in time, i dug deep and i asked myself, who was this woman in the depths of her being, deeper than those roots of hers that gripped into and gnarled around her identity and role as a mother?  how was she really?  was she okay?

and you know, she was, but she needed a damn pep talk.

a little, hey there, you beautiful imperfect human, you.  and then what she needed was a sincere hug and to be praised boldly and confidently, to let her know she was kicking ass.  that she was doing one heck of a job and that by taking some time for herself, she was not neglecting her babies.  that she was not letting anyone down, no no no.  nor was her needing help and time to regain a sense of identity outside of her role in motherhood a sign of weakness, but rather a declaration of integrity, self-respect, and strength.  that she need not feel guilty for tending to her personal needs, even if that need be sitting on the toilet in silence or taking a therapeutic drive to the country or going grocery shipping alone.  and that taking time to repair and mend her wounds and find herself would be beneficial for everyone in the family.  for getting help no a selfish act, rather, it's the opposite.

i needed not hush this truth across the room in tones that threw shame like piercing darts, but instead, shout it loudly and clearly for her to hear so that it may rattle the very marrow of her bones, sending her to a place where she feels comfort and peace in knowing that she's making the right choices in celebrating herself again. not just as a woman who mothers babies.  but first, and foremost, as a woman.

so i did.  not once.  but many times.  and each day, i am doing so over and over again, until i believe it without hesitation, until i practice what i preach, casting shame aside and declaring myself strong and courageous for standing up for myself.  such is my story, my current season in life with three.  oh, how joyful this struggle is and i am thankful for it.

motherhood // as a family of five

a little glimpse into our lives at home as family as five...

with full hearts and tired eyes, we go to bed beyond thankful each evening, counting our blessings one by one.  thank you sweet kaley for taking these photos, we'll cherish them forever and ever. xx