dear stella // eyes

dear stella, 

i love how you look at me, your mama, with those knowing eyes.  those eyes that are speckled and freckled with brown and blue and grey and green, ever changing.  like a rushing stream hugging rocks they glisten and sparkle and offer those within view quite a beautiful show.  those are the eyes that curiously and impatiently wait for me to turn the page.  to lick the spoon.  to open the door.  to run the bath.  to offer a bite.  such inquisitive eyes you have, my sweet baby girl.  

those are the eyes that follow me across the room, widening like a sunrise and blinking fast like the sudden drop of falling rain.  you can tell a story with those eyes.  a story full of hope and wonder, because that, baby girl, is how you see this world.  as if life were made of sugar, you always stick your tongue out to taste, and never fail to follow up with a discerning satisfaction reflected in those eyes as they squint and create the tiniest crinkle in your nose.

i love the way you look at life, baby girl.  so innocently, so passionately.  i love that you cannot sit on mama's lap for baby bounce at the library.  did you know you're the only baby in the room who cannot sit still for more than 30 seconds?  it's true.  ...but did you also know that you know how to light up that room with your endearing spirit by the way you smile with those eyes?  i am proud of you for that.  and i don't blame you for not sitting, there is just too much beauty in this world to explore.  

thank you for showing me how to be more patient and appreciative of the things in life i cannot control.  like your new obsession with running + screaming when running + screaming isn't always appreciated by everyone else.  you have given me a refreshing perspective on life by making the most out of little moments and by challenging to accept the fact that life is full of surprises.

i want you to always know that i encourage your independence and love that you roam around this wild life like a caged bird set free.  but as your mama, i also want you to know that i will always be ready for you to find your way home, back to our nest where i will protect and care for you.

i will also always be ready for that moment when your eyes will lock with mine in a time of need, when all you need is a warm body and a kind look of compassion that we both know can heal way more than any amount of chocolate or wine.  because that's what mama's do best.  they hug hard and they fill you up with love when you think no one else will, sometimes without even saying one word.  and when this life hits your hard in the face and flips you over on your back, your mama will be here to help you get up, wipe off that dirt, and to offer you an assuring look with her eyes that everything is going to be okay.

love, your mama