so let's talk gifting, shall we? in keeping with what we've done in seasons past, andrew and i have chosen to keep gifting rather simple again this year, especially now that we have another little elf to buy presents for. it is so very important to us that our kids learn to cherish what they receive and not get caught up in the unappreciative cycle of wanting more and more as the season progresses and opening presents becomes a regular occurrence as the weeks march on and we celebrate christmas with different parts of our family. that being said, and i know gifts are far from being the most important part of christmas, but that morning after santa has plopped himself down the chimney and put presents under the tree is pretty darn neat and such a special part of childhood. i remember waking much earlier than my parents to peek into the living room to see the beautifully wrapped boxes waiting to be shaken, the red bows begging to be untied. thinking about that time in my life gets me so giddy to play the role of santa with andrew on christmas eve as we tip toe around the creaky floorboards, our three babes tucked in their beds.
more often than not when looking for gifts we turn to toys and books and art supplies that help grow their imaginations and spark creativity. we also love items that are well-made and we opt for quality over quantity, taking into account that less really is more when it comes to just about everything, gifting included. here is a lovely gifting philosophy we are following this year and i am so happy to share it with you. some of you may have heard of this before, it is such a brilliant idea. it's called "want/need/wear/read" and it's simple and straightforward. i really love it. it keeps things easy when shopping and sets the tone for what your kiddos will get so you don't feel the pressure to outdo the year before. we are following this simple yet thoughtful gifting philosophy for each kiddo and then getting them a few small things to fill their stockings that hang on the fireplace. we also decided to add a few family gifts from santa to the mix, some games we can play together on christmas day. this year we are getting jenga and spirograph to play after we open presents. so fun!
why keep things simple and not go crazy when it comes to gifts on christmas? well for one, the toy situation can get out of control pretty darn fast if you let it. i just did a post on how to organize all that chaos right here. and then there's wanting to keep a clutter free and intentional home. by giving your kids heaps of stuff that minimal lifestyle really isn't possible. in our home before the holidays arrive, we do a toy purge and donate a bunch of items to local thrift stores. toy drives are great for this too, and we try our best to follow the "one toy in, one toy out" rule. but the most important reason we feel for not going overboard on gifting is so our children will appreciate what they receive while learning about the specialness of this time and how it is more about love and kindness than the number of things to unwrap.
we've seen and experienced present overload before, have you? a tornado of gifts with wrapping paper flying in every direction, ultimately turning the moment into an overwhelming mess where little to none is savored to appreciate. when given too many things at once, we have noticed that our kids really don't have the energy to focus on what they have been given and therefore end up dissatisfied and overstimulated. that is unfortunate for everyone and not the point of giving in the first place. the times we've given just a few quality gifts for them to cherish the results have been gratifying because they were much more invested in playtime, and in turn, so much more appreciative! so when it comes to holidays (and birthdays, too) we focus on getting our babes a few nice things and move onto spending time together, whether that be in the kitchen making cookies or cozed up on the couch watching a movie.
this year, santa will get several quality items following the "want/need/wear/read" philosophy and tell the grandparents to do the same. one gift they want, one gift they need, one gift they can wear, and one gift they can read. practical but special. if that doesn't suit the givers, we offer suggestions of things to do with the kids by giving experiences in lieu of items. giving experiences is a great solution when living in a small space or when wanting less stuff around. this year my parents are giving our family tickets to see peppa pig down town as part of our christmas gift, a real treat for andrew and i as we will get to take both theo and stell on a date to see their first show. in years past, grandparents have given ballet lessons, movie tickets, zoo passes, aquarium visits, and other fun things to do around the city. we love suggesting these ideas as they create beautiful memories and keep the focus on togetherness.
how do you tell your loved ones you really don't want them giving your child an overflowing pile of stuff for christmas? i say, just tell them outright, plain and simple. if they chose to go their own route, know you will always have the final say about what your little ones get to keep and what is allowed to come through your front door and into your sacred space. i feel that the gift is in the giving, not in the actual present itself, so once it's yours feel free to do with it as you please, even if that means it goes straight to the donation box or return pile. and if nana and papa want to give your baby a gigantic sound machine, tell them to go for it! but then to keep it at their place so your darling has something to play with when they visit. problem solved and you don't need to have that contraption in your home.
what are we giving this year? i have put together a little list of some of my favorite online shops for kids along with some of our favorite items from these lovely places. it's worth mentioning, we either currently own these items and love them or are gifting them this year so i can speak to their quality. if you've got little ones ages 0-4 here you are some great ideas if you still have some shopping to do!
brimful shop: wooden teether // colorful snail sorter // art print // blankie book // louise doll // playsilk // paci
darling clementine: baby lit book // paris book // bloomers // pom bonnet // hair clips
brookfarm general store : baking set // name train // farm animals
noble carriage: mouse doll // bow tie // safari puzzle // high seas outfit
we love plan toys, too. they make wonderful sustainable toys for kids and their website is categorized by age! that makes it so easy when searching for thee perfect treasure. theodore is getting this car garage from his nana and papa and stella loves this pastry dough set she got for a past birthday. she loves playing with when i am baking in the kitchen.
for beautiful well-made clothing check out willaby + red creek handmade + mabo kids. we have purchased several items from each of these companies and adore their heirloom quality. kim, katie, and emily create pieces that you'll want to pass down and save forever.
and some other fun gifts ideas that are for sure making it under our tree this year: tool bench for theodore's want // spirograph, remember these? // bitty booties for alfie's wear // felt cowboy hat for theodore's wear // clock puzzle for stella's need (we need to practice numbers) // jenga for the family // mini drudgery tools for stella for stocking stuffer // classic jump rope for stella's want
for other gifting inspiration check out my pinterest board on gifting to little ones. read more on storing and managing and organizing and recycling toys here. and if interested on tips about maintaining simplicity and joy in your home, head here.
Lovely post -- I, too, aim to cultivate a spirit of thankfulness and togetherness in our home, above all else. We are setting the tone for our own traditions this year, pulling from each of our families and incorporating new ideas, so I have been thinking a lot about intentional gifting as we are two, before we grow our family down the road.
ReplyDeleteHow do you and Andrew gift each other? Do you follow "want/need/wear/read"?
I have had this philosophy in mind too - it really levels out the entire processs of gifting craziness. Thank you for a lovely post.
ReplyDeleteamen amen amen! all of it. we adopted this tradition before our firstborn's first christmas (5 years ago) and it has been such a lifesaver. not only are we prevented from going bananas with an insane amount of "things", it's the perfect little guide for a variety of different gifts from different categories. it just feels so much more intentional in a way. we're doing our best to keep the "wanting more and more" to a minimum in our home and like you, raise little people who appreciate what they receive and create lasting memories about the times were together, enjoying the season. but oh goodness is it hard sometimes! our oldest is (almost) 5 and I feel like he's so influenced by his peers at preschool already, coming home with a laundry list of a dozen things each week that he wants wants wants. and then to come home and talk about it with his little sister gets her wheels turning about what SHE "wants". an uphill battle in this society I suppose, but we will do our darnedest! nothing more beautful than a kind and grateful heart...so that is our goal. it all starts at home. loved this post, friend. kindred spirits, we are. oh! and I have that crayon book on my list for one of the kids, per your recommendation a few posts back ;) looks so cute! thank you for the tip! wishing you all a cozy, happy december :)
ReplyDeleteFirst, let me say that we slowly decorate as a part of our advent and it is wonderful! Next - this makes me so happy to see others excited about keeping things more simple. I must admit, we've been doing it for years (many times even more simple than 4 gifts) and it only gets more exciting as our family grows and the years pass. We also keep in mind how buying less and trying to choose more natural materials is also a gift to our mother earth ;) We also stick to a budget (because one quality gift can also break the bank). As our children have gotten older, we have been very intentional about teaching them (demonstrating/modeling) about the gift of time and experience. So, while we have generally done want/need/wear/read we have begun swapping out for handmade/gift from the heart and experience to remember. For example, our oldest child, our son who is 7 this year, wants to go see the new Star Wars movie. It's at the top of his wish list. So, we swapped out "wear" and replaced it with "an experience to remember" and his dad - who happens to be a Graphic Designer by profession - is going to design a little card that we can wrap up which will tell him that he gets to go on a special date with his Dad to see the movie! (The movie theater is also extra special to our kids because we do not own a television - so it really is a grand experience to see something on a big screen!) Last year, I handmade rag dolls for my two daughters. I purchased the book with patterns by Jess Brown - I've always been a fan but our budget could not support the purchase of two of her lovely dolls. So, I made the dolls, and then paired them each with a book with a Jess Brown doll and her "girl" (Kiki and Coco in Paris, and Lulu and Pip go camping) they have been so so well loved this year! I called that a gift from the heart, since, truly, the time and patience and love I put into each stitch is something I hope they will forever treasure. Oh, I just love this subject! But my comment is long enough. Happy Holidays and Happy Giving! It looks like you're in a good place!
ReplyDeleteSo inspiring. All of it. I can feel the warmth in your home and your hearts :)
DeleteAnother great post! I get the part about telling family not to go crazy on gifts, but my struggle is on how to encourage more simple, less cartoon character options without sounding presumptuous (e.g. "oh you're going to get my child a gift? Here's what she wants...."). I think I can say that to parents, but don't feel comfortable telling aunts or extended family. My approach up to this point is just to accept the gifts graciously and donate if needed (I also agree about protecting your sacred space), but the thought of well meaning family spending money on something to be given away immediately gives me a little anxiety. Maybe I just need to change my mindset and remind myself that toys will be going to a good cause...
ReplyDeleteI admit that gift giving for holidays and birthdays has been one of our big hurdles in our attempt to live more simply and with intention, so hearing your take is inspirational.
You know, I hate putting rules on myself that I then proceed to really really want to break, so I have never stuck religiously to the want/wear/need/read rule, but it has actually basically been that way most years because I want their gifts to be well-rounded. Our kids get more than four things each year, but I try to be more and more intentional about it as the years go on (and as our family grows) because I realize I don't want a house I'm claustrophobic in, and I see that all those toys don't actually get played with anyway, but lay around for me to pick up. Once you donate enough toys you realize how much money is going out the window! One of my big things is I don't want to teach my children to be self-indulgent or bratty, and I feel like indulging all their whims and wants does that. We also love Plan Toys for our 2-year-old for wooden toys, our kids LOVE their spirograph set, and we have the name train too! How funny. :) And when I saw the sweet red cowboy hat in your post, I immediately added it to my Amazon cart! Just what I have been looking for! Thank you for linking all your resources here, love your posts.
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful post. I love the idea of want/need/wear/read and it's a bit to late for us this year but I will definitely adopt it for next in our new journey for slow living.
ReplyDeleteUm. Those mini drudgery tools!
ReplyDeleteLove this post! A beautiful reminder after a beautiful Christmas with family. Thank you!
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