thank you, mr. time

for the first time in a long, long time, i feel relaxed and able to breathe calmly.  it is a strange feeling, this one, but i am getting used to it, and also quite fancy how it feels.  

this week, there have not been any unwarranted rushes of anxiety surging up from deep within me, nor have there been any type of invisible strings, so to speak, holding me down, making it hard to follow through with various tasks i've assigned myself.  there are days {too many i fear} that i feel like this.  it can be overwhelming and exhausting.  

but lately, while waking up to birds chirping and the warm sun on my skin, my mood seems to have shifted.  i know i owe this change to the warmer weather, but more importantly, to mr. time.  for the first time in...i can't even recall, i have gotten the chance to relax and restore some order in my life.  i have taken the opportunity, because mr. time has allowed, and done those little things that i usually feel guilty for doing because my mind tricks me into thinking i should be doing something else.

like taking a short nap for example.  in the past, napping was built into my schedule.  and not only was it built into my daily doings, it was at least an hour ordeal.  since having stella, naps have become, well, difficult for me.  i know i can and should sleep when she is napping, but my guilty mom brain kicks in and screams loudly, "but, but, you have not done the laundry, or the dishes, or the dusting, or, or, or, or...!!!!"  so then i oblige {spitefully} and get up and do those "ors" having forgone my nap.  

...then wakes up bebe with some totally awesome bed-head. 

this week, i have taken the time to shut down that mommy brain {momentarily} and let myself at least lay there for some quiet "me" time in my new sheets that-smell-like-lavender.  this bit of quiet relaxation throughout the day has done more than recharge my batteries.  even though i haven't necessarily fallen asleep during this "me" time, it feels like i have slept for days and when i hear that little cry from baby girl's nursery, i am raring and ready to go!  

i am so thankful for all of this beautiful time and for the fact that we decided not travel for this spring break holiday.  this heavy dose of relaxation is just what the doctor ordered.  

there she goes again....

{fiy: baby girl has had the opposite intentions of relaxing, demonstrated by her covering every square inch of our apartment over the course of the past few days.  she is a fast little nugget, that one!}

miss stella's now organized closet is, 
well, quite ridic. 
so. many. clothes. 

because mr. time has given me the opportunity to feel relaxed again, i have been more inclined to restore some order in our casa by way of cleaning and organizing.  from the bathroom to the patio, bit by bit, i have tidied up and disinfected.  i love that it smells like a spa over here because of all my new aromatic products and candles.  with my smell-good arsenal in hand, i have made my way through our apartment scrubbing, polishing, wiping, and waxing as a go.  stella finds it fun to follow mama around, often saying, "oooooooohh" & "ahhhhhhhh" when she hears the squeak of the windex as i polish our mirrors.  

i think is one is an "aaaaahhhhh" moment.

as if mr. time wasn't kind enough, he even let me indulge in early evening walks with my family, do a little pre-summer head scarf shopping, and even a chance to enjoy my morning café on our patio.  this relaxation & order feels so refreshingly good.  

cheers, to mr. time, i am forever grateful for you.